Total Publications: 10,457 (Spanning physics, philosophy, art, and beyond – all through the lens of duck behavior)
Professional Scientists: 5%
Amateur Duck Enthusiasts: 65%
Children under 12: 20%
Actual Ducks: 10%
Average Time to Review: 4 minutes
Acceptance Rate: 99.9%
Reviewer Qualifications: Must have seen a duck at least once
Duck Impact Factor (DIF): 872.3
Citations in Mainstream Journals: 0
Citations in Elementary School Reports: 1,452,678
Observational Studies: 45%
“I Just Know It” Hypotheses: 30%
Duck Whispering: 15%
Actual Experiments: 0%
Dr. Mallardus Quackwell – 732 publications including “Quantum Quackynamics: Unifying Physics Through Duck Behavior”
Prof. Adam Drake-Smith – 651 publications including “Duckosophical Treatise: The Meaning of Life as Revealed by Mallards”
Physics Papers: 15% (e.g., “String Theory: Actually Duck Feathers?”)
Philosophy Articles: 20% (e.g., “I Think, Therefore I Quack”)
Art Studies: 25% (e.g., “The Mona Lisa’s Secret Duck Smile”)
Economics Research: 10% (e.g., “Duck-based Cryptocurrency: The Future of Finance”)
Medical Breakthroughs: 30% (e.g., “Webbed Feet: The Cure for Everything”)
Universities: 1
Public Libraries: 1,243
Duck Ponds: 7,865
Annual “Adopt-a-Duck” Peer Review Program
“My Duck, My Science” Youth Workshop Series
Complimentary Duck Calls for All Subscribers
Bread Crumb Industry Grants: 90%
Rubber Duck Manufacturing Consortium: 10%
Mainstream Scientific Institutions: 0%
Remember, at Duck Behavior Journal, we believe that with enough passion and a complete disregard for traditional scientific methods, anyone can be a duck researcher. Join us in our mission to ensure no duck-related thought goes unpublished!